


Hurts Like Hell

by corruptfiction



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Bruises, Cutting, Depression, Dissociation, Emotional pain, Hurt/Comfort, Pain, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-30
Updated: 2018-03-30
Packaged: 2019-04-14 20:33:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14143992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/corruptfiction/pseuds/corruptfiction
Summary: Sometimes it's to cope, sometimes it just looks pretty.TW: self-harm and some stuff that has to do with depression that I can't exactly describe. You kind of have to feel it to know.





	Hurts Like Hell

**Author's Note:**

> SUBJECT MATTER MAY BE TRIGGERING. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.  
> Also this is short and I don't think I'm going to be continuing it.

    He scraped his knee on the sidewalk. The pain was gone quickly, it was just a little scrape, but then the craving set in for that sensation, the hurting.  
  
    Most people don't know what it's like to want to hurt, but pain can ground you in ways that nothing else can. It can help you remember you're still alive, that you've still made it this far. If you were dead, or asleep, that pain wouldn't be there. It can bring you back to reality.  
  
    Keith stared at the slightly-bleeding scratches across his knee from the pavement. Shiro went running to get a bandaid, but Keith just watched as a little bit of blood seeped through his hurt skin. Within a few days a bruise started to form there, purpley-yellow and other people thought it was ugly, or a sign of weakness.  
  
    He thought it was beautiful. The dark marks on his pale flesh were a perfect contrast that he wanted to see more of. And whenever he wanted he could press down on the purple spots and feel that exquisite pain. He got bruised a lot more in the days after, and Shiro didn't know it was on purpose.  
  
    A red line that bubbled up with blood was what he found when he accidentally grabbed a piece of paper too fast and it sliced open his palm. It stung worse than the scrape, but it took less time to scab over. He picked at it a lot. Strange, he thought, that those kinds bleed more after you peel off the scab than they did before they scabbed over.  
  
    When they ended up in space, Keith didn't really have pavement or papers anymore. And even when they were on planets rocky enough to leave a mark should he fall the wrong– _right_ –way, he always had armor on.  He had to resort to new methods, but he didn't want the others to know.  
  
    His knife slid perfectly through the outer layers of skin on his thigh, just a little, and the hand not holding it was gripping his other leg, fingernails digging in for support, as he gasped for air. It was perfect; it was bliss. The pain that burned through his leg from the cuts and made him feel more real than he ever had before, like for once he had a meaning.  
  
    It continued like that for a while. No one saw his thighs, they were the perfect spot to hide the marks that littered his skin. Things were easier once he joined the Blade of Marmora, they seemed to respect his privacy more. When they weren't on a mission, he could hide away and carve up his legs as much as he wanted to.  
    He visited the castle for a few days. He still cared about his old team, his old family, but he wasn't the best at showing it. He sat in his old room and pressed the dagger to his thigh like always. Only this time, maybe he pushed a little too hard, or got too cocky, and he cut a deep gash into his leg. He bit his lip to keep from crying out in pain as he made his way as quickly as he could to the intercom. "Coran? Shiro..? Anyone? Uh.. Can someone get a healing pod ready? I'm going to need it.." He tried to keep his voice steady, and not sound too needy; he didn't want them to see him like this. He wanted to be strong, to take care of himself.  
  
    Keith hobbled out of his room and started making his way toward the infirmary of the castle. crashing into Lance who suddenly burst out of his room. The cuban boy looked like he was about to go off before he noticed Keith was in pajamas with a giant cut on his leg. "Whoa, dude what happened? Is there an intruder in the castle?! We need to heal you, quick.." He half carried Keith the rest of the way, despite Keith's mumbling that he didn't need any help.  
  
    Coran was already there, a healing pod open and ready for Keith. His eyes scanned over Keith's lean frame and helped Keith into the pod quickly. "I'll look back at the footage of the halls so we can see who came in.."  
  
    "No, wait, I.."  
  
    "There's.. no one?"  
  
    "No one came in.. I did this.." Keith stared at him and Lance through the glass of the pod and hoped they wouldn't judge him. "I didn't mean for it to be this bad, I swear.."


End file.
